tell yourself you’re hot. tell yourself you’re amazing. tell yourself you’re untouchably, radiantly attractive. do it every day, even if it feels like you’re lying to yourself. insist to the mirror that you’re the cutest thing its ever reflected. if you do it enough eventually it wont feel like lying anymore, it’ll be automatic, and you’ll recognize yourself as the incredible babe you really are.
If you think a girl is cute and awesome and really cool and genuinely like her but won’t date her because she’s chubby or fat and you don’t want people to judge you for it then please remember you’re a piece of shit okay, promise
“My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you’ve been mean to someone, they won’t believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it’s time to stop being nice, then destroy them.”—Laurell K. Hamilton, A Stroke of Midnight (via rabbitinthemoon)
“I asked my ex, now good friend, if she would ever have an open relationship and she said, “No, I don’t think I could do that” then after a pause and a smile, “but what about love affair friendships?” She went on to describe an impenetrable fortress of female friendship, her own group of best mates who’d known each other since school and had supported and loved each other through almost all of their lifetimes. They sounded far more bonded to, and in love with one another, than their respective husbands. It struck me that we don’t have the language to reflect the diversity and breadth of connections we experience. Why is sex the thing we tend to define a relationship by, when in fact it can be simple casual fun without a deep emotional transaction? Why do we say “just friends” when, for some of us, a friendship goes deeper? Can we define a new currency of commitment that celebrates and values this? Instead of having multiple confusing interpretations of the same word, could we have different words? What if we viewed our relationships as a pyramid structure with our primary partner at the top and a host of lovers, friends, spiritual soul mates, colleagues, and acquaintances beneath that?”—Rosie Wilby, “You’re More Polyamorous Than You Think” (via sodisarmingdarling)
“Get excited about the little things. About wearing a new outfit for the first time. About Sunday brunches with your best friends. About the new cute guy in your class. About finding an extra dollar in your pocket. About anything that even remotely makes you happy because as you grow up, passions fade and enthusiasm gets mistaken for foolishness. So don’t let the grey world stop you from shining.”—note to self (via themilkywhiteway)
“If you’re a woman and you don’t wear enough make-up, there’s about an 85% chance that the first person you see when you leave the house will ask if you’re tired or sick…
Conversely, if some dude’s inbuilt conceal-o-meter scans your eyeliner as a millimetre thicker than the Department of Warpaint’s cat eye regulations, you’re likely to be charged with five counts of Offences Against Natural Beauty…
Part of this phenomenon is that a lot of people, and almost all men, don’t understand how make-up works. Make-up was, and still is to a large extent, one of those private self-maintenance tasks ladies perform out of male view, because putting it on openly fucks with the illusion it’s supposed to create. Traditional make-up - and especially ‘no make-up make-up’ - is supposed to make your face look ‘naturally beautiful’…
Sponging on the foundation where dudes can see messes with men’s suspension of disbelief and can even cause anger, confusion or disgust. You tricked me!, he thinks. I thought you were a natural beauty! Now I see [it was] an illusion… “If I know she wears make-up,” muses the dude, “maybe she burps and farts as well. That’s not hot at all, and women are supposed to be hot…”
Wearing ‘too much’ make-up also renders the make-up itself visible, rather than contributing to the impression of a woman’s inbuilt, effortless fuckability. It’s often connected to unbecoming displays of overt sexuality: … ‘that heavy eye shadow makes you look like a whore’…
This does open up the enticing possibility of using make-up in rebellious ways, though - playing with colour and glitter or doing a hot pink lip can make you look fantastic and repel men who expect more subtlety in make-up practice. Or you could take a more direct approach, like writing IT’S NOT FOR YOU across your cheek in green shimmer eyeliner. You go girl.”—Eleanor Robertson, "All Made Up" (via crystalcabinet)
“[Spiderman] represents the everyman, but he represents the underdog and those marginalized who come up against great prejudice which I, as a middle-class straight, white man, don’t really understand so much. And when Stan Lee first wrote and created this character, the outcast was the computer nerd, was the science nerd, was the guy that couldn’t get the girl. Those guys now run the world. So how much of an outcast is that version of Peter Parker anymore? That’s my question.”—
Part of Andrew Garfield’s response to people being all butthurt when he mentioned a possibility where Spiderman might not be straight.
oh wow we’re living in a society where people realize that white cishet abled men with odd hobbies are not the most ostracized members of society and there are things a lot worse than some guy having difficulty getting a girlfriend how terrible
please remember andrew garfieid is an ashkenazi jew who grew up in Britain - i heard in Europe jews are not racialized as white idk on the specifics of britain’s racialization of jews, but either way i think that’s one reason i think he gets this a little more is he is oppressed as a jewish person although i see that he often fails to acknowledge this - especially since he characterizes himself as white here and elsewhere i’ve seen him only refer to himself as having unmitigated privilege
(it’s interesting because he has dual citizenship in the us and uk and i wonder how his treatment due to be jewish has fared in both countries) i can’t speak with authority on how jews are treated in the UK - but i think it is telling that i’ve seen him speak out against oppression on a couple different occasions - i read an awesome thing he said arguing for a Black spiderman in future films (esp since spiderman is Black in the comics now) given the complexity of how ashki jews are racialized i think that’s also important to remember when we consider andrew garfield’s statements on privilege and oppression
Let me just point our that if he got any shit for this, part of it is because nerdy men (more specifically, white/cishet/able-bodied men) literally think that they’re an oppressed class in society (you know, the type who complains about the friendzone and brony shaming like those things are any kind of oppression?). They also think that women would spend all of their time and money on nerdy things they don’t even like just to be near them, so try and figure that paradox out… But basically, you have these clearly privileged men chewing out a man who belongs to an oppressed group because he’s speaking out for other oppressed groups. That’s the kind of shit tier guys you’ll find in the nerd community.